The Brokeness Inside As Hope And Less Collide
by xXDrunk Kid KathrynXx
Summary: Just as things seem to take an almost upturn for Ellie, Craig Manning steps into the picture. After a seemingly passionate friday night, Ellie finds herself with a broken heart and an unwated prenancy. More Inside...
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One-  
Ellie's POV

I steal a glance at the clock it tells me there is fifteen minutes left of this hell. Fifteen minutes! That seemed like an eternity. I needed to see Craig. But this time this time it woould be without Manny. I smile at the thought. He'd finally broke up with her. What a slut. Okay that's a bit exterme, but she is! I know she only used to hang all over him in the halls was to piss me off. I bite away at my cuticles. I look again at the clock. Only two minutes have passed. I sigh and begin to gather my books. I tap my foot and my pencil simeltainously. I zone out, staring straight ahead with a glazed look in my eyes.  
"Miss Nash?"  
I blink.  
"Miss Nash?!"  
I snap out of my trance and see who called me. No other than Mrs. Kwan, of course.  
"Miss Nash, do you think you can try a little harder to pay attention next time?"  
The rest of the class snigers.  
I choose to ignore them.  
"Yes Mrs. Kwan, I'm sorry."  
"Just don't let it happen again." I nod in response.  
And so I spend the rest of English paying a bit of attention and scribbling down notes here and there. Finally the bell rings and my stomach is a hurricane of excitement, nevorousness and happiness. As I head for the door, I feel a tap on my shoulder.  
"Hey El what's up?" Marco greets me with a smile as always.  
"Nothing, what's up with you?" I say, with the smallest bit of impatentice in my voice.  
"You know the same," he responds cheerily, "but it seemed in class you had alot on your mind you know."  
"No as a matter of fact, I do not know and I don't have anything on my mind, Marco okay?!" I snap.  
"Woah, alright, alright." He raises his hands in surender. "Well, if there isn't anything you wanna talk about, I have to get to my locker. See you later El."  
"Whatever Marco, bye."  
I suddenly feel a small pang of guilt in my stomach, but I would have to worry about that later. I head down the hallway toward Craig's locker. His back is turned to me so I decide to give him a small tap on the shoulder. He spins around.  
"Oh hey, El. Whats up?"  
"Hey Craig. Um not much I thought you wanted me to meet you at your locker after the last class." I say in a much better mood than I had been with Marco.  
"Oh um about that you see I..."  
He was suddenly cut off by a certain Emma Nelson latching onto his arm.  
"Oh hey, sweetie!" she pecks him on the cheek, her voice so sweet I thought my teeth were going to rot just hearing it.   
Then it hit me. Wait, they were a item?! I couldn't believe this! I feel dizzy and my heart starts pounding in my ears. A lump begins to gather in my throat the size of a baseball. I feel my eyes begin to water up, and I dig my nails into my palms. I bite my lip and I taste blood not long after.  
"Um Craig, I gotta get going." I say quickly.  
"Oh okay, Ellie I'll..."  
I didn't get to hear the rest because the second the words came out of my mouth I already beggining was speedwalk down the hall. As soon as I turn the corner I begin to run, not caring about others staring. The tears are now flowing down my cheeks at such a rate they are uncontrollable. Screw the bus! I run and run and run. I ignore the fact that I'm exhausted and having trouble breathing. I finally reach my front porch and practitally collapse on it. I take a minute to catch my breath before trudging up the stairs. I look over at the couch and my eyes rest on my mom's sleeping figure. I carefully and quietly walk into the kitchen to get a glass of water. I'm not suprised to see a broken glass bottle here and there and I avoid stepping on the shattered glass. I make the slow walk up the stairs to my room and fall on my bed. Today's events replay themselves again and again in my mind like a broken record of some sort. I close my eyes in a despartate attempt to slow my thoughts moving a mile a minute. The tears begin to gather at the corner of my eyes. Damnit. I'd tried to avoid the thought of Craig but it failed miserably. He said he loved me! Wait what I am I thinking? Sean said the same thing! And where the hell is he now?! The phone rings and I lose my train of thought.  
"What?!" I snap into the mouthpiece.  
"Um..Ellie?"  
I feel I have to thump my chest with my fist to prevent my heart from stopping.  
"Ellie, are you there?" Craig asked timidly.  
"What the hell do you want?!" My throat feels as if its on fire.  
"Um...about Emma I..." he began.  
"What about her, Craig, do really think I give a flying shit?! Because I don't!" I lie through my teeth.  
"Yeah well on friday night...and we...you...I..I" he stammers  
"What about friday night?1 I know all you wanted was a free fuck! And you got one! Now leave me alone Manning!" I am about to slam the phone down, when he says:  
"Manny set us up!" he blurts out.  
"WHAT?!" I practically yell.  
"No, no I was referring to me and Emma!" he expains.

"Great then you three can get married and have fucked up kids!"  
"C'mon,El!" he pleads.  
"Fuck you!" And with that, I throw the phone across the room.  
Stupid idea.  
"Elenor! Get down here now!"  
Shit. I've woken up my mother. Thanks a fucking lot,Craig.  
"Elenor!" she screams again.  
I slam the door and put the chair against it. I run into the bathroom and throw open the cabinet. I push all different pill bottles into the sink until I find the one I'm looking for. My mother's Zoloft. I pop 4 or so pills in my mouth and wait for them to have their effect on me.


	2. Chapter 2

Okay I'm really sorry it's been almost a month. I had a severe case of writer's block. This one is a little shorter than the other one by about two hundred words. I know have a good idea where I'm going with this story, so the delay won't be very long. In fact, I think I'm going to begin the next chapter as soon as I post this one. Okay well, enough with the rambling and on with the story.

Disclaimer- I don't own Degrassi or any of its lovely cast.

Chapter Two-

Ellie's POV

I wake up to a very blurred sight. I realize it's my bathroom after a few seconds of uncertainty. I try to stand but fail and fall to the ground. I have a headache the size of Canada itself. After a few more feeble tries, I manage to get on my feet. I open the bathroom door very cautiously. I check the time. About a quarter after seven. Wow. I had been out for almost five hours. I collapse onto my bed and think over the day. Then the memories come flooding back. Seeing Emma and Craig together, running home, the phone call, the Zoloft. I blink away tears. I had to get the thoughts out of my mind. I walk downstairs and cook a half brunt, half raw meal.

One Month Later-

I wake up sweating and run to the bathroom. A wave of nausea and dizziness rushes over me as I bend over and empty my stomach of last night's leftovers. I finish and wipe the remaining sweat from my forehead. This had been going on for at least two and a half weeks, along with fagitue, moodiness, and headaches. I also hadn't gotten my...my..well "monthly complaint" in at least five weeks. I bite my lip. I knew what it could possibly be. I just didn't want to believe it. I walk out of the bathroom and curl up on my bed. I knew what I had to do, and after school, I was gonna do it.

Later That Day-

I walk up the sidewalk and try to avoid the icy patches. It was late

January and that meant about two more months of snow. School had ended about a half hour ago. I stop at a pay phone and deposit the needed amount of coins. I heasitate at first and then begin to dial Marco's home phone. After a few rings, he picks up.

"Hello?"

"Hey Marco, its Ellie."

"Hey El...what's up?"

I close my eyes and lean my head against the cold metal of the phone.

"Well...could you meet me at the pharmacy on Fourth Avenue?" I ask timidly.

"Um...I suppose so, but could I ask why?' he responded.

I wasn't suprised but the question, almost prepared for it, really.

"I..I'll tell you when you get here."

He sighed.

"Alright El", I could hear the doubt in his voice, "See you in fifteen minutes."

"Thanks, Marco."

"Anytime."

"Bye"

"Bye-Bye"

No matter how doubtful he sounded on the phone, I knew he'd come. He would come no matter what the problem. I shove my hands in my pockets and trudge to the bench outside the drug store.

Not even ten minutes later, Marco's truck pulls in front of the store. He runs up to me.

"Hey El."

"Hey."

"Do you want to tell me why I'm here?"

"I guess I have to."

I sigh and then spill.

I tell him everything. I tell him about how Craig and I had unprotected sex on Christmas Eve. I tell him everything about Emma and him walking in the hallway, taking the Zoloft, the headaches, the morning sickness, my missed period and my new fear of pregnancy.

"Oh my god Ellie.."

He hugs me and by now I'm crying uncontrollably, the tears practically frozen. I ignore the stares of passers-by. After a few minutes, I speak.

"And thats why I called you. I need to know, but I just can't do this by myself."

"Its okay Ellie, I understand. Are you ready to go in?" he asks gently.

I simply nod and we get up and walk inside. The pharmacy was the same, but just somehow seemed different, probably on the part on my uneasiness. We head over to the last aisle and find the pregnancy tests. There are so many, and I've never had experience in this, and neither has Marco, so we are both terribly confused. I finally just grab one and head toward the counter. The lady working there looks about middle-aged. She looks at my purchase, and gives me a dirty look. I look at my feet and pray she doesn't say anything.

"Do you want a bag?" She looks as if she is about to laugh.

"Yeah...yeah please." I answer, still not looking up.

We exit the pharmacy and stand outside for a few minutes.

"I have to get going Ellie...do you need a ride home?"

"No..I'll be fine"

Before he leaves, I throw my arms around his neck. He is a little suprised, but hugs back nonetheless.

"Thanks again Marco, I'll call you as soon as I know."

"Okay...but no matter what...what happens I'm here okay?

"Okay."

We hug one last time before parting ways. I watch him pull out and drive away. Then the reality of it hits me. If this thing comes out positive I'll be a mom. I'll have to be responsible for another person's life, all because of one stupid choice. Tears begin to form in my eyes, but I wipe the away. It wasn't for sure yet. But in the back of my mind, I already knew. I turn and begin my long walk home.

Okay, I tried hard with grammer on this one, but if you see any mistakes feel free to point them out. Please review too!


End file.
